I wrote this in the wee hours this morning…
"It's past midnight and the last thing on my mind was to write this blog entry. But I've got the remnants of a 'House' episode bouncing around my head that affected me more than I thought it would."
Without going into too much detail, it was about an obese kid who had problems. One of the doctors was really quite outspoken about his disgust about her being fat. The typical 'she should just get off her ass and exercise, or not shovel everything in her mouth' mentality tinged with a certain amount disdain in his tone. That really struck a nerve! It sounds all too familiar! People who are skinny have no idea what it's like. Most assume that you sit and eat cakes all day. What you don't realise is that 9 times out of 10 there's a mental component that's at the root of the problem. Some of these can be seeded at a very early age, and it's just a matter of time before that seed gets what it needs to grow. This is generally more ignorance of someone's feelings and/or a measure of understanding.
This little girl's mother treated her as a person, not a shell that had extra weight. Often all that child needs to stop that pesky seed from growing is the knowledge that you are loved no matter what. I understand that tough love has its place in the world, but really, all it takes is the belief that you mean something to someone.
Belief... The concept that shapes our whole existence. If you believe that you're not worth anything until you lose weight, then it is an almost impossible task to reprogram that belief*. Every time I try, and think I've succeeded, it bubbles up to the surface when I least expect it. And omg it's a powerful!
It feels like there's always been a tone (whether perceived or real) of 'It's ok, just give up - you won't manage anyway'. Tip: Even if you don't truly believe it, it is always the best option to tell someone, 'You can do it, I believe in you!' In that moment, you instill that belief in the recipient whether you actually believe it or not, and that can make all the difference. What you say to a child can shape their lives in ways that you may not know at the time. A single sentence can haunt you for decades before you take it out and banish it!
Consider these two phrases:
"Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me"
"The pen (words) is mightier than the sword"
Armies can be inspired or destroyed by carefully chosen words, and a life can be tainted by words that have been carelessly uttered...
Think before you say something.... You have more power than you know
And now that I've got that out of my head, hopefully I can get some sleep :)
* Almost... I've found out about something recently, that has been known to alter core beliefs, I'll let you know how I get on. I'm not giving up!
#DwindlingDeeva
www.facebook.com/DwindlingDeevaDiary
"It's past midnight and the last thing on my mind was to write this blog entry. But I've got the remnants of a 'House' episode bouncing around my head that affected me more than I thought it would."
Without going into too much detail, it was about an obese kid who had problems. One of the doctors was really quite outspoken about his disgust about her being fat. The typical 'she should just get off her ass and exercise, or not shovel everything in her mouth' mentality tinged with a certain amount disdain in his tone. That really struck a nerve! It sounds all too familiar! People who are skinny have no idea what it's like. Most assume that you sit and eat cakes all day. What you don't realise is that 9 times out of 10 there's a mental component that's at the root of the problem. Some of these can be seeded at a very early age, and it's just a matter of time before that seed gets what it needs to grow. This is generally more ignorance of someone's feelings and/or a measure of understanding.
This little girl's mother treated her as a person, not a shell that had extra weight. Often all that child needs to stop that pesky seed from growing is the knowledge that you are loved no matter what. I understand that tough love has its place in the world, but really, all it takes is the belief that you mean something to someone.
Belief... The concept that shapes our whole existence. If you believe that you're not worth anything until you lose weight, then it is an almost impossible task to reprogram that belief*. Every time I try, and think I've succeeded, it bubbles up to the surface when I least expect it. And omg it's a powerful!
It feels like there's always been a tone (whether perceived or real) of 'It's ok, just give up - you won't manage anyway'. Tip: Even if you don't truly believe it, it is always the best option to tell someone, 'You can do it, I believe in you!' In that moment, you instill that belief in the recipient whether you actually believe it or not, and that can make all the difference. What you say to a child can shape their lives in ways that you may not know at the time. A single sentence can haunt you for decades before you take it out and banish it!
Consider these two phrases:
"Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me"
"The pen (words) is mightier than the sword"
Armies can be inspired or destroyed by carefully chosen words, and a life can be tainted by words that have been carelessly uttered...
Think before you say something.... You have more power than you know
And now that I've got that out of my head, hopefully I can get some sleep :)
* Almost... I've found out about something recently, that has been known to alter core beliefs, I'll let you know how I get on. I'm not giving up!
#DwindlingDeeva
www.facebook.com/DwindlingDeevaDiary